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SARAH'S SCRIBBLINGS

March 14, 2001
11:30 a.m.

post-surgery rambling

You know, it's funny--I thought I was an old pro at this eye surgery business. But yesterday they threw me a curve ball. They put this thing on my face which was actually supposed to push the blood out of my eye. I'm telling you I thought I was going to have a panic attack right there on the bed! There is almost no more sensitive place for me than my eye... If you do things to my eye you can make me feel absolutely infantile, at the world's mercy--and that is a scary feeling to have. Mom thinks she has an idea of how it feels. Yeah, ok. She's never had surgery, and I can't imagine anything else that makes a person want to scream, "Get it off!" at the top of her lungs.

I didn't scream, of course--maybe I'm too proud for that. I did beg for the anesthesia early. I don't think my begging got me anywhere, but at least I gave myself the privilege of telling somebody I hated it. And when all else fails, I can think about my cat. *grin*

I vaguely remember seeing the music minister before I went in. He showed up on time, but they had scheduled me an hour earlier than what I was told. I don't think I said two words to him, but I guess that's normal for somebody on her way to la la land. I remember going over a couple of bumps--reminded me of speed bumps--and then I was out.

If it hadn't been for the fact that she was offering me juice (and I was THIRSTY!!!) I probably would have ignored the nurse who was waking me up. I wasn't in the mood to wake up, but I was so thirsty I could have drank the ocean! She tried to feed me crackers, too. That didn't go over so well--my mouth was dry, and I just wanted to drink and drink and drink... Hmmmm... Maybe that J. middle initial is really for Juice.

I know I had the option to walk or ride in the wheelchair to the car. I chose the wheelchair. At the rate I was moving, we'd never get there! I don't remember the ride or getting home or getting in my bed. I don't remember much of anything until 9:00, which was when I decided it was time for soup and a game of Take One.