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Thanks for visiting my diary. I've been journaling since 1984 and have chosen to share some of my entries online. They are not all positive thoughts, but I hope that reading them might be a blessing to someone who needs encouragement.
If you are just coming to my diary for the first time, please read my introductory entry, where I share some background that is important if you plan to follow this diary regularly.
Please also visit my music page, where you can hear samples from my debut CD, I Believe, which features songs written based on experiences shared in this journal.
Well, now I'm not going to say any more but I'm just going to bury my face and cry. I asked a friend a question... Have you ever felt so sad that you just had no strength? I'm grieving, but I think it's more the loss of years of life than the vision. I'm not sure what happened, what made me have that dream, but that's when a part of me woke up, and now I get to grieve the things that part of me wanted and never had. Well, now I think maybe I do know what kicked it off. I sent in my RSVP for the regional About.com event. I want to go, but at the same time it terrifies the strength out of me. I'm new AND I'm different, and I'm probably quite a bit younger than most of the others who will be there. And I think that's what did it. I got so mad hearing my friend talk about this, hearing about teachers making her go by herself just for the principle of the thing! Do they have any idea what this does? So confusing. So crazy on the self-esteem. I want who I am to be ok, but I don't always know who that is.
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http://www.growingstrong.org
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