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Thanks for visiting my diary. I've been journaling since 1984 and have chosen to share some of my entries online. They are not all positive thoughts, but I hope that reading them might be a blessing to someone who needs encouragement.
If you are just coming to my diary for the first time, please read my introductory entry, where I share some background that is important if you plan to follow this diary regularly.
Please also visit my music page, where you can hear samples from my debut CD, I Believe, which features songs written based on experiences shared in this journal.
I'm having a good day today, but it's one of those days when words are not coming. I went out this morning to see my counselor. Her office is just a couple of blocks away, and it's a beautiful day and I walked. Meghan worked phenomenally, and therapy went very well. I haven't made it in there in several weeks, and going over all that's happened I realized how God has been with me even though I didn't know. I realized how important silly little things like making a note of my daily accomplishments have been. And I realized that even though I'm in tremendous emotional pain, I have returned to a state of being determined rather than resigned. That's a change I've been needing for a long time,and I'm so grateful that God is a healer of hearts even when the pain doesn't go away. I'm thinking about my arm again and that whole long week of excruciating pain that kept me from sleeping. I'm thinking about how some kind of healing had to be taking place inside during that week, in aplace where I couldn't see. New skin had to be mature before the damaged skin could peel off. Yes, I know that's disgusting, but isn't it sometimes how things work in our hearts? If the painful scars were peeled off before our hearts were mature inside, we would bleed profusely, and the pain would be worse than it was when we started healing. It may not look like I'm making much progress to people on the outside, but from where I stand I can read those 1996 journal entries and say that I have come a long, long way.
I am a member of Lighted Path, a directory of Christian diaries.
Read my profile. This is not a comprehensive introduction, but there is some fun information there.
Visit my official site to read more of my writing:
http://www.growingstrong.org
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